Half of Me
by Random Dramatic Comedy
Summary: After a terrible accident, Bella lost someone very close to her. She has become the living dead, as some like to refer to it. Bella tries to get over her loss, but finds she can't do it alone. Can a certain green eyed boy help her? AH.
1. Nightmare

**Half of Me**

**Chapter One: Nightmare**

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I was at First Beach, sitting underneath a pale, driftwood tree, our tree, I had come to think of it. I listened to the choppy waves break on the rocks just

_off shore while waiting for my best friend to arrive. He was late, as always. I sighed and rolled my eyes. Well, he always did like to make an entrance, and that's what I loved about him._

_I heard a familiar roar in the distance, and saw Jacob on his motorcycle, speeding this way. A smile broke out across my face, and I waved at him, and he gave me that goofy grin that I adored._

_The smirk was quickly whipped off his face, replaced by a mask off horror as he looked ahead. His bike was headed straight for one of the many trees that line the street, and his brakes appeared to not be working._

_"Jake!" I screamed, as he jumped off of the motorcycle, a split second before it it hit the tall pine tree, making the thick branches sway madly, causing green needles to shower the ground below._

_"Jake!" I yelled once again, and rushed toward him. He was lying face down on the pavement, his breaths few and shallow. I pulled him onto my lap, sobbing his name repeatedly, cradling his almost-still body to my chest, burying my face into his wide shoulder._

_I could hear screams of horror and the sounds of pounding footsteps as people who were on the beach saw the bike, now a twisted lump of metal, curled against the tree, and me, holding my best friend, my _love_, though I never admitted it to him, and watching him fade in my arms. Their cries were muted, I was focused on only one thing now, the slowing heartbeat of Jacob._

_I cried even harder, nearly going into hysterics. "Jacob!" I wailed. "Jacob, I love you! Please don't leave me!"_

_Jacob's eyelids fluttered for a moment, and he whispered one word, "Bella," with a sigh, using his last breath before he lay motionless in my arms._

_"No," I whispered. "NO!"_

I woke with a start, gasping for air, tears streaming down my cheeks. My Jacob. My love.

That memory has been haunting my entire existence for the past two months, thoroughly making my life living hell.

I sobbed, hugging my knees to my chest, rocking back and forth. This has pretty much become my nightly routine, ever since _that day_.

I picked up the glass of water sitting on my side table, next to my bed, choking down the liquid in between sobs. I tried numbing myself, clearing my mind of all thoughts, all emotions, a practice that I have mastered over the past eight weeks. Slowly, I drifted back into an uneasy sleep.

_I was sitting next to Jacob in the sand, tossing rocks along with him into the grey ocean water._

_"Ha!" Jake screamed triumphantly as his stone sailed well passed the boulder that looks like a hook-nosed man, the place of his previous rock-throwing record. "Beat that, Bells!" He laughed._

_I grinned. "You really shouldn't underestimate me, Jacob Black," I said in the most serious tone I could muster. Then I made a great performance of winding my arm as I threw my rock into the dark water, which sailed a total of six feet._

_Jake clapped. "Bravo!" he exclaimed, then laid his arm across my shoulder. "You are clearly the stone-slinging champ!"_

_"And don't you forget it!" I smiled, and we both laughed._

_The scene faded as dark clouds rolled overhead, eventually fading to black._

I woke with a start, though this time I could see the faint morning light streaming through a window. I looked around, disappointed to see that I was in my bedroom. _A dream._ That was all it was. _A mere memory._

I broke down and started crying again. Oh, how I wished I could once again go with Jacob to First Beach and play the games we had in our childhood, to see his smile, to hear his carefree laugh, to feel his warm, rough hand in mine. . . I sobbed harder. Jake was never coming back, I knew I had to accept it, but I just couldn't, I refused to, as I had for the past two months. A world without Jacob was pointless. He was my everything, he was more than just a friend, he was more than company. He was a necessity, like the sun, my own bright, warm sun, the air that I breathed. Without him, I couldn't live.

Not that I haven't tried. I have put on quite a show for Charlie's sake, though I am sure he's not convinced. I do a pretty good job of masking my feelings, but I slip up sometimes. It doesn't exactly help to convince him when he hears me screaming in my sleep for Jacob, my Jacob, my only love. That brought on a new round of sobs, and I was thankful that Charlie wasn't here, having left already for work.

I took a deep breath and focussed on calming myself down, numbing my thoughts and feelings until I had none. When it came down to it, I always chose becoming a mindless zombie over crying over my deceased friend 24/7.

I let myself get ready for school with my normal routine, not paying much attention to anything. I slipped on the first things my hands touched, pulled a comb through my hair, staring at the mirror without seeing anything. I already knew all too well how I looked, and I know it wasn't a pretty sight.

My cheeks were sunken and my skin was paler than usual, all of the color drained from my face. My hair was a mess, no amount of combing could ever fix that, and I had dark purple shadows under my eyes, a mark from all of the sleepless nights I have spent longing for Jacob. I was also stick thin, having lost weight since the accident, my appetite as well. To sum it up, not only do I walk around like the living dead, I now look my part, too. Not that I cared. I stopped caring a long while ago.

School was the same as always. I payed strict attention to the teachers, always focussing intensly on the task at hand, never letting my mind drift, never letting myself slip up and reveal a nasty truth I did not want to hear. During lunch I turned my attention to the task of eating, taking small, perfectly sized bites. Angela was talking to Ben, and Jessica was chatting with Lauren Mallory and Rosalie Hale, they had all stopped trying to get a response out of me. I was now invisible, non-existent in their world, their happy world where they have never seen a loved one die, never seen the object of their affections so painfully ripped from the world before them. Instead they were prattling on about unimportant things, Angela and Ben about some assignment that I had already finished, the girls about some celebrity. Must be nice to be free of suffering, to be without a care in the world.

After school, I dragged myself to the kitchen to make dinner, as I always do. Normally, I cook only the most long and extensive recipes, so it's nearly impossible to focus on anything else.

Supper with Charlie was a quiet event, as usual. We were never so talkative before I turned myself into a zombie, why should we speak now?

I scrubbed the dirty dishes and went to my room to work on my homework, putting all of my effort into it.

Inevitably, the time came, the hour I dreaded the most, the point of the day where I was the most vulnerable. I crawled into my bed, cocooning the blankets tight around me, numbing my mind, drifting into blackness.

I woke up crying, as usual. Another nightmare, or rather, the same one, the memory of the darkest day of my life. I sobbed even harder. Was this nightmare ever going to end?

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**Though this is titled chapter one, it's more of an introduction, really. And I'm sorry everyone about killing off Jake, I'm not the completely heartless girl I may seem right now, I like Jacob too, but it was necessary to the story.**

**Please review!**

**-Abbie**


	2. Waking Up

**Half of Me**

**Chapter Two: Waking Up**

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Another four weeks passed, and everything was the same. I was as I had been for the past three months, no one tried to talk to me, and Charlie was seriously worried.

"Bella," he said one night at dinner, making me jump at the sound of his voice. "Bella, how much longer do you plan on going on like this, moping around? I know it was a terrible thing, but you have to get over it. Is three months of mourning not enough for you?"

"No, it's not," I said fiercely. "He was my best friend, you expect me to forget about him in just _three months_?" I screeched, and picked up my plate, practically stomping as I walked into the kitchen.

"Bella," Charlie said behind me, obviously having followed me. "I don't think you're going to be able to get over this on your own. That's why I think you should get some help. I know someone who helped me a lot after your mother's death-"

"A shrink?" I asked incredulously. "You want me to tell all of my problems _to a shrink_?" He nodded his head. "No!" I shouted. "No, no, no, no, NO!"

"Bella, it's fine," Charlie said. "All of us need a little help some-"

"NO!" I yelled once again. "You're not making me go!"

I stormed off to my room, slamming the door with as much force I could muster. I dragged the chair to my computer desk and propped it against the door, using it as a lock.

I plopped down on my bed, sobbing miserably. What was I supposed to do now? Charlie didn't like my zombie-act, which I only put on for his sake. So what, he'd rather have the tears? I shook my head.

Fine then, I won't be the living dead anymore. I'll try to act like a human being, emphasis on the word try. I wasn't sure if I could do it, but I'll attempt it, at least. I'll start tomorrow.

Of course, I still woke up crying in the night, there was no preventing that. It was a fact of life now, nothing can change it.

I put some effort in picking out my clothes, at least making sure that they matched. I wet my hair and managed to work out most of the snarls. I looked better than I have in a while, but still not good.

At school, I broke out of my regular routine of listening to the teacher with unbreakable attention. Instead, I looked around the class, surprised to see how much the faces had changed in three months. Really, had I been asleep? I supposed I had, in a way.

During lunch, I said hi to Jessica and Angela, which caued Jessica to look like the table had just asked her out. Angela, on the other hand, welcomed me back, and talked with me.

"Yes, everyone can't wait until tomorrow!" she was saying.

I tilted my head, confused. "Waiting for what?"

Jessica whipped her head to face me. "Haven't you heard?" Apparently not. "Three new students are supposed to be coming tomorrow."

"And we're throwing a welcome party!" said Rosalie.

I faked a smile. "Great, now I can't wait either!" I must have lacked the proper enthusiasm, because Jessica and Rosalie were talking again about some new fashion line.

"So, are you going to go?" Angela asked me.

I shrugged. "Nah, I don't think so. Parties aren't exactly my sort of thing."

"Come on, Bella, I don't want to go alone. Think of it as your waking up party!"

"Who are you, and what have you done to Angela Weber?" I looked at her.

She giggled. "Oh, just come with me, Bella. Please?"

I sighed dramatically. "Fine. But promise me you'll release the real Angela out of hiding first, okay?"

She laughed.

The rest of the day sped by fast, and I was surprised that school was over so soon.

That night, it took the longest time to get to sleep. My mind was racing, analyzing the differences between my friends, as they were before, and how they were now. There was a huge difference, a lot changed in three months.

And then I thought about tomorrow. Three new students, that's got to be a record for this small town. I wondered what they would be like, and I realized no one had even told me their names. Must be old news.

I suddenly had a feeling in the pit of my stomach, it sort of felt like. . .anticipation? I don't know, I felt as if tomorrow was going to be a good day, as if something absolutely wonderful was to take place.

I drifted off into a light, dreamless sleep, the best I have had in three months.

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**Sorry it's so short, I wanted to have the next day in a different chapter.**

**Review (Please!)**

**-Abbie**


	3. New Kids in Town

**Half of Me**

**Chapter 3: New Kids in Town**

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The next day when I got to school, everyone was buzzing about the new students. I had just gotten out of the car, and I already knew their names: Emmett and Alice Cullen and Edward Masen. I quickly learned that Emmett was going into his senior year, and Alice and Edward were both Juniors, like me.

There were clumps of students everywhere, gossiping about the newcomers, no doubt. I suddenly felt a surge of pity for Edward, Emmett, and Alice, they were going to be the subject of talk for weeks. I was glad that I was born here, and at least didn't have to go through the awkward situation of a new school.

I walked quickly to class, diving in and out of groups of people. Of course, with the crookedness of my path, I was bound to trip over something. Sure enough, I caught the tip of my shoe in a crack on the sidewalk, bumping into someone and dropping my books everywhere.

"Sorry," I said quickly to whoever I knocked in to. I bent over to pick up my books, and was just reaching for the last one, but a pale hand beat me to it.

"Here," a velvet voice said, clearly a guy's. "I think you dropped this." I took my book without looking up and mumbled a thank you, and continued to class.

Neither Alice nor Edward were in any of my classes before lunch, so the first time I saw them was in the cafeteria.

It was strange, everyone was either staring at a table I couldn't see from the line I was in, or talking about Edward, Alice, and Emmett.

I got my food and sat down. I was just in time to hear Jessica gush about the new guys' hotness. Will the gossip never end?

I numbed myself from the sound, Jessica was beginning to get on my nerves, no offense to her. Hm, this numbing thing sure does come in handy.

Of course, clearing your mind of everything did have it's downside. When it came to Biology, let's just say I wasn't in the most cheerful of moods.

I sat at my assigned table and dug in my backpack for the homework I had so carelessly stuff into my bag. My hand closed over something that felt like a bracelet. And it was, it was the charm bracelet Jacob had given me for my last birthday, a bracelet I had carried with me, if I wasn't wearing it, so I would have my own little piece of Jacob wherever I went.

I felt the tears beginning to come on, but I couldn't exactly start bawling my eyes out in the science room. I shoved the bracelet in my pocket, and forced all thoughts of it out of my mind.

Class was about to start when someone entered the room last minute.

"Ah, so you must be Edward Masen," I heard Mr. Banner, the teacher, say.

Everyone stared at Edward, including me. I nearly gasped.

He was perfect, there was no other way to describe him. He had a gorgeous face, his features flawless. His hair was messy, though in a stylish way, and an odd bronze sort of color. He had pale peach skin, which was flushed with embarrassment. Looks like I'm not the only person in the world that blushes so easily. But his eyes, his eyes were perhaps the most striking feature of all. They were a brilliant shade of green, and looking at them made me feel a little. . .off.

"Well, let's get you seated," Mr. Banner continued. Shoot, don't let him sit by me! I will, without a doubt, either babble like an idiot, stare at him the entire period, or begin bawling my eyes out over the bracelet, any one making myself look like a nut.

"Let's see, why don't we put you," _don't say my name!_,"by Miss Swan. Bella, will you please raise your hand?"

I stuck my hand in the air. Of course, it made sense that Edward sat by me. I was the only one in the class without a lab partner, and Mr. Banner wasn't going to make Edward sit by himself. It made sense, didn't mean I liked it, though.

I heard the seat beside me scrape against the floor as Edward sat down, but I didn't move my eyes from the board.

I adjusted my position slightly, carelessly bumping my hand against the lump in my pocket. My eyes began to well up, and it looked like option three, bawl like a baby, was how I would embarrass myself today. I think I would actually liked babbling like an idiot more than this, but I couldn't control that. It took everything I had to hold back the water threatening to spew out of my tear ducts.

Class passed slowly, and by the end, I was exhausted and no smarter than when I entered the room, since preventing myself from crying turned out to be more work than I would have dreamed.

"Er, are you alright?" a familiar velvet smooth voice asked.

I turned to see Edward Masen looking at me worriedly. I felt the blood rush to my cheeks.

"I'm. . .fine," I replied hastily, and turned, leaving the room as quickly as I could.

I ran for the restroom, locking myself in the nearest stall. I inhaled deeply, but instead of calming me down, it initiated my tears, and soon I was sobbing in the bathroom.

Eventually, I was calm enough to stop tears. I took the bracelet out of my pocket. The silver links blinked in the light, and my eyes rested on the only charm on the entire bracelet, a single carved wolf. Jacob had carved it himself for me after telling me one of the Quileute legends, one claiming that the protectors of the tribe were men who could become wolves.

Luckily, I was out of tears, so I didn't start crying again at the memory.

I looked at my watch to find that I was ten minutes late for my next class, History. Oh well, Mr. Thomas, the teacher, never cares if anyone is late, he never notices either. He doesn't even take attendance until the end of class, he always forgets.

I splashed some cool water on my face and made for my next class. Of course, when I got there no one paid any attention to me. Most people were either on their cellphones or listening to music, and Mr. Thomas was too caught up in his lecture on the Boston Tea Party to notice me.

After History, I had to deal with an hour of P. E., my least favorite subject of the day. It was even more terrible due to the pounding in my head from all of that crying.

Finally, the bell rang, ending the worst school day of my life. I wanted nothing more than to go home and collapse on my bed. So I did.

A few hours later, the doorbell rang. I let Charlie answer it, I really didn't want to get up.

Charlie popped his head through my bedroom door. "Bella, Angela Weber's outside, saying you two are going to some welcome party."

Party? What party? And then I remembered: The new kids welcome party. Shoot.

"Uh, can you please just tell her I'm sick or something?" I asked Charlie.

Charlie sighed, looking me over. "Alright."

Five minutes later, I heard someone come in my room. My head was under my covers, so I couldn't see who it was.

"Bella, get out of bed," Angela said. "You promised."

"That was before I knew how crappy a day today was going to be."

"Which is exactly why you should come. A party will lift your spirits!" she insisted.

I lifted the covers and looked at her in the eyes. "Really, who are you? Some sort of clone robot? What happened to the Angela I used to know?"

"She was subjected to listening to Lauren, Jessica, and Rosalie's babble about fashion, guys, and hair. I really think I've dropped a few IQ points."

"I wouldn't doubt it." I pulled the blanket over my head again.

Angela ripped the covers off me and threw them across the room.

"Hey!"

"Bella, come on. Please. For me," she begged.

"I give up. Why do you want to go so badly?"

Angela blushed deep scarlet. "Well. . . I. . . uh . . ."

From all of Rosalie, Jessica, and Lauren's conversations I have witnessed, I could easily see where this was going. "Who is it?" I asked.

"Ben Cheney." If possible, her face grew redder.

"Okay, I'll go." I couldn't possibly let Angela down now.

"Thank you! I'll wait in my car," she said with a smile.

I grabbed the outfit I had picked out yesterday and changed in the bathroom. I ran my brush quickly through my hair, leaving my mahogany locks down, boring as always.

I climbed into Angela's car, and was relieved to find that the radio was turned off. I don't think I could take it if some gooey love song started playing.

In no time, we were pulling up to Rosalie's house, where the party was already in full swing. It looked to me that Mr. and Mrs. Hale were out of town, I doubt they would have allowed such a loud party as the one I was only witnessing on the outside.

"You ready to go in?" Angela's soft voice asked. Not one bit. Take me home.

"Yeah." I braced myself as I began what was most likely to be one of the worst nights of my life.

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**Okay, I am sooooo sorry that that update took so long! I actually have had this chapter written way back when I first published the story, but I've been on vacation with my friend for a week, then I got my laptop taken away for not cleaning my room :-(. Right now, chapter four is about half-way done, though it might be a while before I update again, since I'm back in school. But don't worry, I promise it'll be up within a week.**

**-Abbie**


	4. The Party

**Half of Me**

**Chapter Four: The Party  
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When Angela and I arrived inside, it was like a movie scene playing before our eyes. The ordinary lights were out, replaced with neon strobe lights that flashed in time with the blaring music. The living room furniture was cleared away, replaced by a DJ stand and a clump of dancing bodies. A table was pushed off to the side, holding a punch bowl and finger food.

"There's Ben!" Angela yelled over a loud rap song, and I was amazed at how easily she could spot anyone in the jumble of people.

I smiled. "You go ahead, I was going to go get some punch anyway."

She grinned back and weaved expertly through the crowd. I headed to the refreshment table, as I had said.

The food on the table was all picked over and mushy, and the punch didn't smell like punch. It was truly a stupid thing to spike a punch bowl at a party in Forks, whoever did it obviously didn't take in account the many twists and blind turns in the average street, not to mention the threat of deer leaping onto the highway. They were going to get everyone killed.

I walked away, but had the need to get out of the room. I was beginning to get a little claustrophobic, and my head was now pounding in tune with the beat of the drums.

I pushed open a door, hoping I wasn't walking in on somebody, but was relieved to find myself in the kitchen, alone. I peeked in the refrigerator, surely there was a soda around here somewhere. No such luck. Obviously, I wasn't the only one around here with a craving for caffeine.

I grabbed a chair and sat at the kitchen table, since it was either that or the floor. I hadn't even been here for thirty minutes and I was already having a rotten time.

I laid my arms on the table, and jumped as I heard an unexpected tap. I looked down to see my charm bracelet dangling innocently on my arm. Why in the world did I wear it? Did I want to make a fool of myself by crying in front on everyone?

"Are you okay?" I jumped; I hadn't heard anyone enter the room. I looked up to find myself looking into the green eyes of Edward Masen.

"I'm fine," I said, expecting that to be it, that he'd just go about his business and leave.

"You don't look okay," he continued.

"You know, some girls might take that as offensive," I pointed out.

Edward chuckled once. "Well, you don't seem to me that type of girl. Why don't you tell me what's bothering you?"

"That's my business. Why don't you go back to your party?" I snapped. This guy was starting to get on my nerves.

"I've never really been that much of a party animal, that's Emmett. So I'm probably going to be here a while."

"Alright," I said, pretending to be totally oblivious to what he said. "Have fun." I stood up and made for the door, but he beat me to it.

"Bella, please stay," he said.

"How do you know my name?"

Edward smiled slightly. "Biology, remember?" Oh, right.

"Oh, well, I just have to. . ." I moved closer to the door, but Edward blocked it again.

"Please, I have no one else to talk to."

I laughed once without humor. "Right. You have an entire party dedicated to you, you are the talk of the school, which makes you the most popular guy in town, yet you have no one to talk to."

He rolled his eyes. "Let me rephrase that. I have no one of intelligence to talk to. It seems they all decided to skip the party."

"Thanks so much." I tried once again to exit the room, blocked again.

"That's not what I meant," Edward said, running a hand through his hair.

"I know. Now can I please leave?"

He shook his head. "Not until you tell me why you were crying."

"I wasn't crying!" I protested.

Edward wordlessly took his hand and brush my cheek, bringing his finger back in front of my face so I could see the tiny drop of water.

"Fine. I-I stubbed my toe."

"You're a really bad liar, you know?" he pointed out.

I gritted my teeth. "Will you please just let me leave?"

His face softened a little. "Sorry, I just want to help."

"You can. Open the door."

"But I don't know what's wrong," he protested.

I rolled my eyes. "Don't you think if I wanted you to know I would've told you by now?"

He just looked at me. "Look," I continued. "I'm all better, see, no more tears, now let me go."

He sighed and stepped to the side, revealing the door. I ran through it, entering the dance floor once more. I scanned the crowd for Angela, but I couldn't see her with all of the people and the dim lighting.

The song "Love Story" by Taylor Swift began playing, and everyone broke into couples. I felt a sharp pain in my chest, which caused me to start gasping for breath. I ran to the front door and sat on the porch, still breathing heavily. I felt the first of my tears begin to pour down my face, and I didn't stop them. I couldn't stop them.

_We were both young when I first saw you_. We were, I couldn't even remember the first time we met. _I close my eyes and the flashback starts. _I recalled our childhood, Charlie bringing me to play with him, making mud pies in my backyard, celebrating my fifth birthday with him sitting beside me, us at the beach plugging our ears as the New Year's firework missiles shot through the air and exploded, brightening the sky. I remembered our teenage years, going to the movies, staying up late telling each other about our day, celebrating my Sweet 16, holding onto him for dear life as we sped down the road on his black motorcycle. My sobs increased at that last memory.

I shivered against the cool night air and curled my self into a ball to stay warm.

"Bella?" a low voice called. "Bella. Are you alright?"

I couldn't see through my many tears, but I recognized the concerned voice as Edward's.

"Bella, can you calm down?" I was crying like mad by now, but I just couldn't stop. This was beyond my control now. I was sobbing harder now than I was at the funeral.

Edward placed a warm hand on my shoulder, probably meaning to comfort me, but it just made things worse. I used everything I had to get up, and, once I was standing, walk away, still crying and wincing at the pain in my heart.

I heard Edward following and calling after me, but that just drove me further. I didn't want anyone poking their head into my business, especially people I hardly even know.

I entered the beginnings of the forest, but that didn't stop me. I was fueled by anger, Edward was starting to get on my nerves. I wished he would just give up, just leave me alone. He was worse than Mike Newton in seventh grade, the year he had decided to stalk me. I remembered spotting him hiding in some bushes outside of my house on more than one occasion.

I stopped and looked around. I couldn't see much, just vague outlines of the dark trees. I didn't see any movement whatsoever, so I figured I lost Edward. Good.

I sat down, happy to finally be alone. But then I realized something. Edward wasn't the only person I had lost in the woods. I've also lost myself. Just great.

I sat down in the damp grass and leaned against a tree trunk. I was actually quite comfortable. Maybe I'll just rest my eyes, and wait until light to find my way back. . .

"Bella!" a shout echoed in the distance. I groaned. So he hadn't given up after all. "Bella!"

I heard a nearby shuffling and gasped. It couldn't be Edward, his call was too faint for him to be so close. A sudden wave of fear hit me, even though it was probably something small, like a rabbit. Something brushed against my ankle, and I couldn't get together quick enough to stop the scream that bursted from my lips.

I heard footfalls headed towards me. I heard a shuffling sound again, and was relieved to find it was only Edward. "Bella, are you alright?"

"Yes," I replied, stubbornly keeping my gaze away from his concerned face.

"Well, I think we've both had enough scenery for the night," he joked, trying to lighten the mood. "Why don't we head back?"

"Actually, I think I'd be better off on my own." I headed off in the direction of the party.

I heard Edward's voice behind me. "I hope you know you're heading deeper into the forest. Party's the other way."

My cheeks flamed. "Of course, I was just walking off, dramatic exit, you know," I lied.

He chuckled once. "Right." He gestured to in front of him. "After you."

I rolled my eyes and walked forward, this time actually trying the whole "dramatic exit" thing. I didn't succeed, though, I tripped over a tree root. Right as I was about fall face-first into a prickly-looking bush, Edward caught me easily in his arms.

I blushed and jumped back up quickly and continued walking towards the party, keeping my eyes on my feet so I wouldn't trip again.

I heard the party before I saw it again. I could feel the vibrations from the speakers as I walked on, and from that I could tell it was a fast song, which was good for me, since I would probably end up running into the woods again if it was another slow little love song.

I ventured inside the house and looked around for Angela. I sensed that Edward was still behind me, but I ignored him, intent on finding my way home and away from this place. I finally spotted her as the colored spotlights made another sweep, which revealed her making out with Ben Cheney. Hm, I never thought she was so straight forward, but then again, she has been hanging around Lauren a lot.

"Are you looking for someone?" Edward spoke into my ear so he could be heard.

"I was," I replied, then walked off toward the front door.

Unfortunately, he tagged along. "I can drive you home, if you want to leave so badly," he offered, but I shook my head.

"Nah, I'd rather walk."

I had hoped that by now he would have gotten the message, but he continued on, unfazed. "Really, I know where everything is, including your house," he told me.

"How?" I blurted.

"Rosalie and her friend Lauren gave us the grand tour of the town. I now know where everything is, including your house. You're Chief Swan's daughter, right?"

I ignored him and continued walking toward the street.

Edward suddenly pulled me backwards roughly, just as a speeding SUV rolled right over where I was not even a second ago. "You sure you don't want that ride?"

"Fine," I surrendered.

I followed him through the maze of parked cars until we stopped in front of a silver Volvo. Edward opened the passenger door in a gentlemanly fashion, gesturing "After you" with his arm.

The ride began as a quiet one, both of us sitting in the car awkwardly silent as Edward sped down the highway. After a few minutes, Edward seemed to grow tired of the quiet, and turned on the radio. _If Today was You're Last Day _by Nickelback began playing, and I gripped my seat. I grounded my teeth, focusing on anything but the music, my eyes already starting to tear up. "Can you please turn it?" I managed to ask Edward.

He looked at me, and turned the radio to some classical station. "Better?" he asked, and I nodded. We shared a few moments of silence, before Edward broke it again. "So, what do you have against Nickelback?" he asked.

"Nothing against them," I said. "That song just. . . makes you think too much for my liking. It's a bit depressing."

He nodded, and looked back to the road. "What about Taylor Swift? I never figured Love Story for depressing."

I gripped my seat. "That's none of your business."

Edward grinned a little. "What happened? Something bad happen after going to a Taylor Swift concert?" He looked back at me. "Oh my God."

"No," I said quickly. "I've never even been to one of her concerts. And if I wanted you to know about my problems, don't you think I would've told you by now?"

"Maybe," he said slowly. "Or maybe your just afraid of the memories talking about it would dredge up."

"What?"

We were nearing my house by now. Edward pulled into the driveway. "You know, I think I have it pretty much figured out," he mumbled, more to himself than me.

"Oh, really, well then reveal my soul, Oh Smart One!" I said sarcastically.

"Well," he began. "It seems like you've faced a near-death experience, and you've lost a loved one in the process. A boyfriend, perhaps?"

"Wrong," I stated. "Sure, I've had more than my fair share of near-death experiences," most because of my extreme klutziness, but I left that part out. I continued, "But no." I grounded my teeth, becoming angry. "You really thought that after spending, what, thirty minutes in total with me, you'd have me all figured out?" Edward opened his mouth to speak, but I beat him to it. "Well, you were wrong." I opened the car door and got out. "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't speak to me again." I walked away, but my manners made me turn around. "Thanks for the ride home."

I quickly slipped inside. Charlie was asleep upstairs, I could hear his snoring from the living room. Good, I really didn't want to talk right now. I hurried up the stairs, taking two steps at a time, in my anger not even caring if I tripped. I opened my bedroom door and all but slammed it behind me. I sat on my bed and took my pillow and punched it. Who did Edward think he was, anyway? Some kind of all-knowing shrink? He probably saw me crying, and thought, _Hm, a challenge_. That would explain a lot.

I felt my hand brush something cool, my charm bracelet. I had taken it off before the party, so that I wouldn't dwell too much in the past while there. _Lot of help that did_, I think miserably to myself. Tears began to well up in my eyes as I looked at it. I didn't stop them as they began running down my face.

I rolled over on my back, still allowing the tears to stream down my face. I took the bracelet and held it against my cheek. I imagined telling Jake about this terrible night, him nodding sympathetically and patting my hand with his big rough one. Then Imaginary Jacob pulled me into one of his bear hugs, which comforted me immediately. Then I fell asleep.

* * *

**Okay, I'm sorry this is so late, I had a bad case of writer's block, not to mention all of the schoolwork I've had and the bad cold that has been bugging me for more than a week now. On the bright side, this is sort of a longer chapter, a little more than six pages on word pad, which is pretty long for me. And you get to see Edward!**

**Okay, so the next chapter will hopefully be done by next Saturday, but I haven't even started on it, and I don't want to make anymore bad promises.**

**Well, I guess that's all I have to say now. Oh wait, no, one more thing: Please review! :)**

**-Abbie  
**


	5. Two Words

**Half of Me**

**Chapter Five: Two Words  
**

* * *

The weekend passed painfully slow. It seemed like my defences had been shot down, the wall I had tried to build had tumbled down, allowing a stream of unwanted thoughts to flood into my mind. At first I tried homework to create a temporary dam, but that was soon done with. I cleaned around the house, mopping the floor twice and spraying Lysol on everything we had, but those were tasks that did nothing to keep your mind occupied. So I picked out a book at random and started reading. That was fine, until I realized it was a romance novel, the kind with an unrealistic fairy tale ending, which caused me to begin sobbing. Again. I really needed to get a life.

But that just seems so impossible, because Jacob's gone, which left me with not even half of what I was.

Tired of myself battling myself in a losing war, which always ended in tears, I decided to drive around town.

I climbed into my big, rusty gas-guzzler and brought it rumbling to life. I cruised down the highway, perfectly fine until I passed a jeep sitting stationary on the side of the road.

_It was late, around midnight when the movie let out. It had been my turn to choose a movie, and I chose a horror. I had forced myself to sit through the entire movie, repeating the words, "It's a movie, not real. Don't be a baby," over and over in my head as one horrific death bled to another._

_"That movie wasn't scary at all," Jake boasted, putting his arm over my shoulders. "Was it, Bella?"_

_"N-not at all," I lied. "Barney's scarier than that."_

_Jake sniffed. "Bella, you know you're a terrible liar. Although, I have to agree with you, Barney can be pretty creepy. He scared the crap out of me when I was five." I laughed, and the fear I had held before disappeared._

_I drove us back to town in my noisy truck, since Jake was still too young to drive then, and while on the highway, I noticed my truck making an unusual noise. "Hey, do you hear that?" I asked Jake._

_"I dunno, kind of hard to hear anything with Ol' Grumbler thundering up a storm."_

_"Don't call it that," I told him. "And that's what I'm talking about. Doesn't my truck sound weird?" I asked._

_Jacob raised an eyebrow. "You mean more than usual?" I rolled my eyes and nodded. "A little, I guess. Time for a new one!"_

_"Ha, ha, very funny." I looked at the hood anxiously. "You don't think it's going to break down, do you?"_

_Just as Jake opened his mouth to speak, we heard _clunk_,_ clunk_,_ clunk_, and the vehicle came to a complete standstill. "Wonderful," I sighed, and rested my head on the steering wheel._

_"I'll go see what's wrong with it _this_ time," Jake said._

_I raised my head from the wheel. "Hey, you act like this happens all the time! My truck is actually pretty reliable, thank you very much!"_

_"Which is exactly why you brought it to me to fix seven times _this year_." He grinned._

_"Minor things," I insisted, but he just smiled and walked to the hood._

_A few minutes later, he came back. "I don't know what's wrong with it," he said. "It's seems to be. . . normal."_

_"Well, the next gas station isn't for a while," I said, then sighed. "Ugh, it's times like these I wish we had cell phones like every other teenager in America."_

_"I know."_

_"So what do we do?" I looked around nervously. We were stopped on the side of the highway at midnight next to the woods, where anything could be lurking. I quickly refocused my attention to Jake, banishing the horrifying fantasies from my mind._

_Jacob shrugged. "I don't know. We could try walking to the gas station you were talking about."_

_"At midnight? There won't be anyone there!" I pointed out._

_"No, but there are pay phones," Jacob said._

_"Oh," I said, feeling like an idiot. "But still, it's late."_

_"Come on, I'll protect you." He grinned. "Unless you'd rather stay keep your truck company."_

_"No thanks," I said quickly._

_Jake grinned, and we began the long walk to the gas station. Along the way we joked so we would stay awake, I remembered feeling like I was about to fall asleep where I was standing. _

_We eventually made it to the gas station, and ten cents later we had a very tired Charlie on his way to pick us up. _

_After that experience, Jacob trusted my truck even less, and every time I had to tow it to his house so he could fix it, we would always have a big laugh about that night._

I was brought back to reality as the bumps on the side of the highway told me that I was drifting off the road. I quickly jerked the wheel, swerving back into my lane. I really shouldn't drive on a busy road while this distracted, I thought. Tears were already beginning to blur my vision as my emotions caught up to my mind.

I turned onto a side road, not really paying any attention to where I was. I pulled over to the curb and turned off my truck.

The tears were streaming down my face now, I was starting to sob. Really, was there anywhere I could go where I wouldn't cry?

I sat there for a good ten minutes, crying my eyes out yet again. After those ten long minutes, I began to notice my surroundings, and the first thing I saw was a house, one I instantly recognized.

The sight of the house brought a new round of tears. It was the Markes's house, the place where we got our motorcycles. The Markes's were throwing them out, and Jake liked a challenge, so I towed them over to his house. Of course Charlie had no idea, he was always going on about how motorcycles were "reckless" and "stupid".

Saltwater was rolling down my cheeks again, which brought me to my last point: Wasn't there _anywhere _that didn't remind me of Jacob?

_No where in Forks, _a voice in my head said. _You and he have shared too many memories in this area._

That voice made everything clear, and in an instant, I had already made up my mind.

I pressed the gas pedal and turned back onto the highway. _No where in Forks,_ I repeated to myself. There was only one thing I could think of to help my situation, two simple little words that I was surprised I hadn't thought of before: _Run away._

_

* * *

_**Ooh, cliffie!**

**Sorry for taking so long, again I blame school. And this year I have to take Computer Discovery, which is basically learning how to type "correctly", and that is seriously messing with my mind. Literally. I think I might go crazy.**

**Oh, and there's one thing I want you to do for me. I want you to name the song that annoys you the most. Why? It's a mystery. . . Just kidding. No, I have a perfectly good reason for asking that seemingly random question, you just don't know it yet. So go ahead, review or PM me! You may just get a special surprise if you do!**

**-Abbie  
**


	6. Author's Note

**I have some bad news: This story is on hiatus. Most likely permanently.**

**Reason time. First thing, I blame school and my extracurricular activities. Plus the fact that after school nearly everyday I have to babysit my little brothers until one of my parents gets home, so that takes up time, too. Second, I'm not that obsessed with Twilight anymore. I'm starting to move on. And lastly, I've lost interest in the story.**

**So no more chapters from me, I don't think. I'm sorry.**

**But if one of you would like to continue this story, feel free to drop a review or PM me. **

**-Abbie**


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